In many ways, it seems like lifetimes ago, and in many ways it was.
A few years back my family and I lost an uncle, a great soul and the kind of person that everyone would want to know. The kind that rarely swore, was loving, respectful, and grateful for his children and family. On a trip to Disney with his wife, children and grandkids, he closed his eyes, and never again woke up.
It was devastating to our family. A man so young, still working, with so much to offer…how did this happen, and why?
As we struggled to make sense of this unexpected loss, another circled the horizon and soon made her presence known. His wife, our beloved aunt, second mother, and kindest soul the world had ever known had grown tired. After decades of caring for her husband who suffered from Diabetes and her own breast cancer, she now had a relapse.
In a six month time frame, our close knit family would soon face another very difficult loss. She would not die in her sleep though. Her illness, much more painful and lengthy, tested the very core of all our faith and beliefs.
As we went, as a family from hospital hospice to home hospice, we valued each minute with her and did all we could to keep her comfortable and positive.
As days grew into weeks and the summer began to nearly fade into fall, her conditions worsened and as we stayed, in shifts, night and day, we began to learn about each other, our worth, our beliefs, and her, my Cioci Shirley, my second mother and best friend.
As her time here, on this physical plane was coming to a close, she left me with several definitive answers. None to be disputed, even if I did dispute her…which I didn’t…there was no reason to.
As quiet nights passed, and passed, and passed, they may have seemed endless to someone else, to me though, each were a gift. I would listen to each dream, story and vision, knowing that what she was seeing was a glimpse, speck and vision of the unknown, for now, for me.
Before she fell ill, she would tell stories of my Uncle coming to bed with her after he had physically passed. No one doubted that the bed sank on his side when he got in, and certainly no one questioned her when she could hear the TV on late at night, as he often dozed in his recliner.
Now, just weeks after, as I passed by that same recliner, in the dark, or by the light of the moon, the hairs on my neck would stand up and a chill would go down my spine. Each time. Every time. The hospice nurse would explain that all things have energy and his energy was still in that chair, just because his heart was no longer beating, his essence still remained, for whatever undetermined amount of time, it would, without question, remain. And it did.
While I chatted with my best friend one night, one very late night, I told her about this chair and she assured me by saying, “well, if he is there, you know he would never hurt you.” And that has made all the difference.
As Notre Dame began its season, and the Red Sox ended theirs, and the bright colors of the trees began to flourish, she left us. One calm, quiet morning, after a night of talking to me, she closed her eyes, and finally, went to those that had been coming to her for so many weeks.
As I remember those weeks, and that day, I write about, mostly to think, and remember her, but also to be with her on some level. As the sun begins to set outside my window, and a cool summer breeze blows in, I snuggle up a bit in her chair, her recliner and allow my mind’s eye to see the sights of that summer, hear the sounds of childhoods past and feel the energy that she left, in her chair, for me. Forever.
Energy then and now, has played and continues to play a part and who I am, who I was (no doubt) and yes, who I will become.
There is no doubt that energy exists, even to those skeptics…it just does. So who are we to say when that energy ceases ? A body ceases yes, when the heart and brain stop, but when does the energy from that soul stop, if ever…and so, when does energy from anything else stop, if ever?
I invite you to soul search here…dig deep, even those skeptics! If energy exists, and we know it does, and since we don’t know when it ends, if ever, I ask you…what would you use positive energy for…if you had it? If you could manifest a thought, what would it be?
With that in mind, please visit www.energymuse.com, check out the Guardian Angel bracelet and let us know what negative energy you could release from your life, and what positive energy you could bring in.
Trust me, it’s much easier to wear a bracelet or necklace than to carry around a recliner! I have worn Energy Muse for almost a decade now and been in touch again with the sea, been offered protection, given the power of manifestation to my sister, been grounded and so much more!!
What would you do, if you could not fail?
CONTEST RULES
To win the guardian angel bracelet with coin from Energy Muse Jewelry:
1. Check out Energy Muse Jewelry’s home page at http://www.energymuse.com/ and read the description of the guardian angel bracelet. (Use the search box at the top right corner to search for the piece.)
2. Become a fan of Energy Muse Jewelry on Face Book. http://www.facebook.com/energymuse
3 .Return to comment on this essay to share your story of strength and how you (have) or (want) to overcome an obstacle in your life. What would you do, if you could not fail? What would you use the positive energy of the guardian angel bracelet for?
4. After completing all three steps each comment will be judged based on their inspiration and creativity. One winner will be revealed Monday, June 7th at 3:00pm (PST).
Get that creative energy flowing! GOOD LUCK!!
Peace, Chris
Entries (RSS)
June 2nd, 2010 at 6:04 pm
The guardian angel bracelet would help me to overcome obstacles in my life, such as depression, strenghthen my will to quit my extremely stressful corporate job and begin my own business (which I have wanted to do for years)! I lost a child only 1 day after her birth, suffered 2 other miscarriages. Years later during a difficult divorce, my son went through a period of depression and drugs and ran away, was in jail and moved away and does not call or come (he now lives an hour away). So he is still living, but not to me (that put me in a major depression to the point that I really don’t know what I did for over a year). My daughter and her family have recently moved in (husband and 3 & 6 year olds), and my 2 stepdaughters are selfish and unforgiving. I think the guardian angel bracelet will protect me from hurt and further depression and guide me and strengthen my will to start a new business which will give me the opportunity to quit my job. Thank you for the opportunity to enter this contest!
June 2nd, 2010 at 6:06 pm
Oh, Chris. How you’ve stumbled into a space that I adore!
My Guardian Angel took her post, watching me, when I was 15. Her name is Rita. She is my maternal grandmother, and she passed away quietly, yet painfully, at home after a 7 year battle with bone cancer, metasticized from Melanoma. She’s been visiting me, guiding me, nudging me, correcting me, and lifting me my whole life. When she died, I came to terms she would NEVER go away.
She hasn’t.
She began the journey of angels for me. Since then, I have several that watch me and my family – my Father In Law, my 10 year old cousin, my maternal grandfather, my paternal grandparents, my aunt. But she is the “one” that was chosen for me. Once, about 10 years ago, I was once told a very poignant and detailed story about the probability that angels did not exist here on earth, in heaven, or any plane for that matter. I re-butted with my depiction of her visit just three weeks after we buried her to calm my nighmares forever; I re-told the story of the guiding principles she taught me, and how she ensures they are carried out today; I lovingly reminded that person that my husband would not be in my life today had she not sent him to me, my Irish Sean Patrick, because she insisted I marry an Irishman; and lastly, I gently reminded this person of the harrowing birth experience of my first born, and the fact that had she not been watching I would not be standing before them. I also reminded this person that when an angel shows their wings to you, it’s not your place to question whether or not they will work to “lift”, but to allow the energy to bring you to a new place – a place of peace.
That person was not happy with me. They also didn’t believe me, or care to spend time with me. I stood strong in my conviction, and thanked my Angel for the pathway to tell the stories.
You asked us to tell you “what we would do, if we wouldn’t fail”. I cannot tell you the number of times I have had this exercise in a sales class, or seminar. I have a list of things I would do, but I will honestly tell you, I have no fear of failing these things …. I just haven’t prioritized them. To me, that’s not a good reason. To me, that’s an excuse. Your request makes me breathe. Your request makes me listen to my guardian angel – right now. Right here.
Write a Children’s Book
Participate, and COMPLETE a triathalon
Go Hangliding
Go Parachuting
Backpack through Europe
chip away at my BUCKET LIST. I have one. It’s got 112 things on it. I have completed 15 or so.
My angel nudges me everyday to be better. To find a place of peace …. of patience. Of doing.
That collection of bracelets speak VOLUMES to me. LOUDLY. It’s as if you’ve gathered all the angels together to sing a chorus.
Failing isn’t the piece that holds me back. My Angel pushes me to think. And you’ve opened a wonderful door for me to walk through.
Thank you.
June 2nd, 2010 at 6:17 pm
Hi LouAnn, I am sorry to hear of your troubles but am happy to have you in the contest, reaching out, reaching in and opening up!!
Peace, Chris
June 2nd, 2010 at 6:19 pm
Hi Karin, you are an amazing soul! Your words are inspiring and beautiful. I am grateful to have you in my life and so thankful that you have found Energy Muse!
Peace, always…to you and your Irish family…Chris
June 2nd, 2010 at 8:36 pm
Hi Chris! Thanks for this opportunity. The toughest thing I have ever had to overcome was the loss of my pregnancy (my son) at 6 months gestation. I had worn every crystal I was drawn to or was listed as helpful for fertility. I had struggled to get pregnant. Then when I did I wore Unikite for a healthy pregnancy. When I loss my son, I loss faith in many things including crystals. It took over a year to gain that faith back. I gained it back when my daughter was born 3 days short of a year from my son’s death. Her due date was the same as his death. She was also the first girl born in 52 years in my husbands family. We never thought we would have a girl. Then, when she was born she had a birth mark on her forehead that is an angel kiss. My other son who was five at the time told me that his brother Connor had kissed her before she was born. That way we would know he was with us. I started gaining my strength and faith.
However, during this same year my five year old started having signs of ADHD, OCD, and Tourette syndrome. This has become our daily struggle. We have relied on crystals in our home and on ourselves to keep us going and to help keep him focused and calm. It does help some, however, each day is a struggle.
With the gaurdian angel bracelet I would be able to carry my lost son with me always where others can see. I would also be able to gain the strength to better help my son (who is now 12) through his daily struggles. I hope it will also give me the strength to be a stronger teacher for my students that deal with severe emotional disabilities daily. Going through each day full of the ups and downs of my students and my son, then give my daughter the attention she truly deserves is draining. I could realy use the crystal strength from the gaurdian angel.
Thanks for listening.
June 2nd, 2010 at 8:46 pm
Hi Kim, welcome to the four leaf clover family! I am so sad to hear of your loss, and as I read I felt speechless, until you said a name, a special name…Conor. (different spelling though but same) If you read the least few essays I wrote you will learn of a special person who touched and changed my life, certainly a guardian angel. It is amazing to me, still…how we are so connected!
I hope you enjoy the site, and please subscribe…I write just as a mental sandbox and welcome any and all feedback!
Peace to you and your family, Chris
June 3rd, 2010 at 11:34 am
Beautifully written, Chris. The angels were guiding your hand on that one. What a beautiful bracelet! I used to carry quartz and other crystals around in my purse the way other women carry lipstick. I used them too in Reiki sessions. Every little helps.
I’ve always been a believer in the energy flow, both what’s within us and what we emit. We leave our energy trail wherever we go, both positive and negative. That’s why it’s so important to stay positive as much as possible.
I know many others who believe the same, though they don’t practise what they preach. I’m not perfect. I’ve been guilty of falling by the wayside myself, especially in tough times. The irony is that’s when you need to be at your most positive and have the most trust that all is as it should be.
It’s been a tough few months: I lost one of my oldest and best friends to cancer, whose onslaught was swift and merciless. My parents’ beloved dog finally was put to sleep at the ripe old age of 15. Heartbreaking doesn’t describe that. He grew up side by side with my son and was always a joy to us.
Right now most of all I’d want my guardian angel to give some comfort and peace of mind to my husband and I about his health. We’ve had some major scares these last few months still to be resolved. I get frightened sometimes and disheartened that “friends” melt into the background at the slightest hint of serious illness, taking their much needed support with them. I’m the opposite. I’ll bumble and stumble my way in to be there for them, not always saying the right thing I’m sure but wanting them to know I care. I’m too uptight right now to access my intuitive side the way I normally can to gain insight and boy do I miss that.
(A side note to Karin: I agree absolutely about the angel’s wings and believe you. I have experienced being enfolded within them once in my life when I was depressed and at the lowest of low points. The sensation of overwhelming love is indescribably beautiful and serene. The comfort that brought me inside has never really left. The surety always lies beneath.)
So, what would I do if I couldn’t fail:
Sing in a band and perform on stage
Publish my children’s story and give away copies
Live on 20 acres of countryside and open a dog shelter, giving them room to run and still be safe.
Learn Spanish.
Teach kids that life isn’t all about what you have or haven’t got, and about who you are and can become.
Remember more often that the tribulations as much as the triumphs shape us and happen for a reason.
Thanks for the chance to enter, Chris! Create a wonderful day.
June 3rd, 2010 at 12:03 pm
Hi Kay, Thank you for joining in and sharing abour yourself. I am so sorry to hear of your losses. Life is challenging sometimes, as you well know, and all we can do is hope and talk to our angels …and know that everything does work out as it should. I’m here for you my friend.
On a positive note, I am so happy to hear of all your dreams and goals! I love the dog camp idea!!
Peace to you and well wishes of health for your family, Chris
June 3rd, 2010 at 1:22 pm
Hi Chris,
What an incredibly beautiful article! Thank-you for this opportunity. Winning the guardian angel bracelet would help me overcome my doubts in myself and help me listen much more carefully for guidance from my angels, which is very much needed right now. I am searching to truly understand my purpose in this lifetime and to fulfill it.
I have lost several people who were very dear to me in my life. In two instances, those people came to me in a dream right after they died. One of the people was an incredibly dear friend and I was feeling guilty that I hadn’t called her in some time, especially as she had asked me to call in a Christmas card she sent me just a couple of months earlier. In my dream, someone knocked on my door and when I opened it, there she stood with a beautiful smile on her face. In that moment of the dream, I knew she was not upset with me and had forgiven any perceived wrong. That was an amazing moment and I have felt since that time that she is one of my guardians/angels.
It is hard to say what my toughest loss has been, as I have lost the two closest friends I ever had several years ago, and I have lost a very beloved grandmother. I miss all of them still, yet feel their loving presence around me. In addition I have lost a beloved pet, who I feel with me quite often (a beautiful and most loving cat).
What would I do if I could not fail:
Use my voice (singing) to bring joy and/or comfort to others.
Find a way to share wisdom gained with others, so as to help them on their paths.
Travel extensively.
Open a bird rescue, especially for exotic birds, whose owners often “discard” them because they find them too much trouble.
And many more things, most likely!
Blessings, light, and peace,
Bobbie
June 3rd, 2010 at 2:57 pm
Hi Bobbie, Thank you so very much for your words and for sharing with us your wonderful journey and dreams. I absolutely love the animal lovers that have joined in on the contest!!
Good luck! Peace always, Chris
June 3rd, 2010 at 4:25 pm
Hello Chris!
First of all I have to say that I love Energy Muse jewelry! I received my first two jewelries today and am in love with them.
Second; English is not my first language so please forgive me if my grammar isn’t perfect. It is late and I am a bit tired now
Thank you for writing and sharing your story with us. While reading all of the others answers I gotta be honest and say that I feel that I do not deserve it as much, because everyone has overcome so many difficulties which I haven’t. Yes, I have had struggles but they have helped me on my way of becoming me. Heartaches, loosing loved ones and other types of challenges… My biggest challenge is to watch my family suffer. Somehow it is easier accepting something negative happening to me, because then at least I can somehow control it. But when it is my family or my friends they have to go through something painful, they have to suffer, they have to endure something.. Oh, I am rambling now. Let me get on to your questions.
What obstacle have I overcome? I became a nurse at the age of 21, which I am incredibly proud of. (being a nurse I am so lucky to see energies all the time). I have a learning disability with math which made it harder during my education. I have overcome obstacles related to work which I wouldn’t have believed I could come through – but I have. And it has made me stronger, it helped me being me.
What obstacle do I need to learn how to overcome? To speak up for myself. To find grounding. Listen to my inner voice.
What would I do if I could not fail? I do not have a fear of failing because I believe if I fail; somehow it is meant to be and another door opens. At least I try to think like that. But hmmm. If I could not fail? I am applying at a school abroad so that would be it. Or work as a volunteer (another dream of mine), open up my own clinic in Africa and work there
Now…for the last question; I wish/want to get in touch with my Guardian Angel. I do not know who it is and would like to feel more secure so maybe it would be easier for me to help others. Then of course I would use the positive energy to help others.
Have a lovely day!
)
-Pia
June 3rd, 2010 at 6:55 pm
Where do I even begin…..I know the word obstacle all to well. I found out I was pregnant at 18, was drug addicted shortly thereafter, and found myself sitting in a jail cell at 21. Now, at 23 going on 24, my life is better than I could have imagined. That’s because it was those obstacles I went through who made me the woman I am today. The biggest obstacle being struggling with drug addiction. I had/have an enormous wreckage of the past that I had to work through and make amends for. I did not feel that I was capable of ever mending the damage in which I had caused. It wasn’t until I became completely honest, open-minded, and willing did those once enormous obstacles seem to become less and less. I have acquired the strength and determination to change my old ways of thinking into positive and constructive ways of thinking. Now, almost three years clean, my life has less obstacles. Go Figure….if I stopped creating more obstacles then the ones I already had, I could’ve been a little better off. Come to think of it though, like I said before, If I hadn’t gone through what I went through at such a young age, I wouldn’t be who I am today. I saw first hand what the recidivism rate was for women who go to jail and get out. I wanted to be one of the women who never went back. However, the odds are against me. I set up a plan for myself when I got there as to what my release plan was going to incorporate. Residential Treatment, Sober House, Work, Continuing of Education, IOP, and so on. I struggled to get into places, struggled on making my way out the door, and struggled when I finally got out the door. I am proud to say that I have done everything I set out to do. Something’s took longer then others i.e.; work. Having a criminal record is and will always be a huge obstacle in my life. Despite the apparent odds I have against me, I am well on my way to becoming the woman I was meant to be. I received a phone call the other day from my old case worker from jail and she had heard how I graduated my program and moved into a sober house. She called to ask me to come back, but this time as a speaker to the other female inmates in the facility. I can now go back and share with the other women where I came from, how I got there, and what I have worked so hard for. To have the opportunity to give other women who may or may not suffer from drug addiction the hope, strength, and courage to know that if you just keep doing the next right thing eventually things will fall into place, is such an honor to me. So those were and some still are my obstacles. I work at them on a daily basis, and they become less and less at the same time.
To not have the possibility of failure frightens me. If I were never able to fail, then I would not have gone through what I did. Same goes for nowadays. Failure; as scary and disappointing as it can be, it gives me the strength to try harder and work harder. If I knew I couldn’t fail, then I wouldn’t put effort into a single thing I did. If I knew I couldn’t fail at trying to stay clean and sober on a daily basis, then I don’t even want to imagine how my life would turn out. I’m glad that at any moment I can fall off the wagon, or lose something I work hard for, because all its doing is giving me more incentive to work twice as hard.
What would I use the positive energy of the bracelet for? To help guide me in the right direction every morning I wake up. To help me get through whatever obstacle whether big or small may come my way. Just to have that extra positivism in my life, along with my higher power so I can go at things with my head held high knowing I will be safe and sound throughout my journey!
June 3rd, 2010 at 7:28 pm
Katie, as imagined I am …well…I don’t…speechless mostly. I, and your family are proud. Keep focusing, stay positive, and move forward! You are an amazing woman and you can do anything you set your mind too!
Peace, Chris
June 4th, 2010 at 11:32 am
Chris,
Your story is very touching.
I saw the posting on energy muse’s facebook page and thought I would check it out. I’m very glad that I did. I have been wearing the 2nd and 4th chakra energy muse bracelets off and on for about 3 years now. I truly believe that our energies affect our surroundings dramatically.
The obstacle that I am trying to overcome is that of renewing myself and the way my energy interacts with my surroundings. Some may say that that’s probably not the toughest thing to do in life, but reflecting on yourself, your actions, your energies and the way others react to those (if you really pay attention) can sometimes be the most heartbreaking and depressing thing you can ever do. It is not an easy task. I feel strongly that it helps us become better people not only to ourselves but to those around us.
To aid me in this process I took a short day trip to the Monastery of Christ in the Desert where I simply observed how simple life really is. It was during this time that I started to feel a very strong desire to learn about who helps guide me through my life.
I have, in the past, had what I call visits from 2 different male spirits, one that I think is actually looking over me and another whom I think was connected to my husbands home (we don’t live there anymore). I haven’t had a visit in quite a while now, it’s been about a year. I feel that my energy paths for communication with him (or others in the spirit world) have been closed off. It’s a difficult feeling to explain, but something definitely feels closed off. Almost like having an energy knot in my chest. And I have to admit, I feel like a part of me is missing. I haven’t been able to figure out why or how to clear them. I really would like to open up those energy centers again so I can figure out who helps guide me in my life. Part of my self-renewal is clearing my energy paths so that I can communicate with the spirit world again.
I would use the positive energy from this bracelet to aid me in the communication with my guardian angel and spirit guides. I really want to know what they try to tell me and help me with. I will then turn the love and guidance that I receive from them toward all those who touch my life.
June 5th, 2010 at 6:32 pm
After reading the stories that have been entered thus far, I have come to the conclusion that I am so very blessed and that the other writers are more deserving than I to win- their challenges and losses have been far greater…
I have my guardian angel- she’s been with me all of my life. She saved me when I almost drown when I was ten, giving me the strength and survival instinct to do what I needed to do to get out of the situation. She helped me to hang on when I almost died from binge drinking at a college party at age 20. I was .325 – borderline comatose – when brought to the hospital via ambulance. Somehow, she managed to tell my drunken friends to call 911 rather than putting me to bed to sleep it off… It was a crazy night, and I am lucky to be alive. She saved me when I was pregnant with my daughter and my ex- had turned abusive. I fell to the basement floor, weeping, one night while doing laundry and begged for someone to take me away from that hell. We were only 6 months into marriage, but he’d turned like Jekyl/Hyde right after we moved to NH. I was comforted in the moment- shown that I was not alone, but that I had a burden to bear, at least for a little while. I have my children for all of my struggles, and I would not change one minute of it, other than to make them unaware of all of the ugliness. I had a miscarriage between them that was very sad for me, but I picked myself up and immediately tried again, and had my son. He was 5-weeks premature and in the hospital for over a week after I left, but I knew all would be OK. He was a little fighter and such a good baby. Once, when my daughter was little, she whispered in my ear to go and “check on the baby” and I found my baby toddling near the top of a tall staircase, where I had forgotten to put up a gate one Saturday morning while cleaning. She helped guide us through the most difficult time in our family’s life- when my daughter was sexually assaulted by my best male friend, who was like an uncle to her. He went to jail, I grieved and struggled with guilt, and helped my daughter deal with it all as best as I could. She is amazing- told him she forgave him at his parole hearing, and she’s gone on with life, more un-scathed than anyone can imagine. I attribute it to my relationship with her, our family, and the fact that she has always been wise beyond her years. But there was always love looking over us.
Through life, I have rarely felt alone.
I have had but minor health concerns, the love of a wonderful family, and a second shot at true love and a happiness, and I know that I am blessed with the company of guiding spirits. My tribute to my other angel, my Nana, is a Celtic tree of life, tattooed on the base of my spine. She was the foundation of a large, fun-loving (though dysfunctional!) family many people dream to have, and I got them. My gratitude for my own children is tattooed on my foot, grounding me (as much as I can be…)
No, let someone else win the bracelet. Their stories are truly compelling.
I think I just might buy the Grounding bracelet, as I have a tendency to get carried away by thoughts, stress, etc. sometimes. I just think too much, about all sides of all scenarios… maybe the Grounding bracelet will help.
Keep up all of this, Chris. You are an inspiration. XO!
Your friend, Shannon
June 5th, 2010 at 8:04 pm
Shannon, thank you sooo much for going against your initial grain and posting this! You are a great friend and true inspiration to me and anyone and everyone who comes in contact with you and your family!!
After reading this I have one small favor? Can you post your beautiful poem? I think you know the one!
And PS your email reminded me of my grounding necklace. I have been wearing it all day. I have the best friends anyone could ask for! xoxox
June 5th, 2010 at 8:20 pm
Hi everyone! Although I am not in the contest I wanted to share some gratitude and thank you’s to everyone who was posted, subscribed, listened to my rants, and pushed me onward and upward.
By reading my posts, you can learn a little about me and I hope you all enjoy reading them!
I am extremely grateful for ALL my friends, family and boyfriend….life is tricky sometimes and everyone has stood by me during this awkward stage of life. Thank you will never be enough….but because there are no better words, I will say to you all THANK YOU! Thank you for sharing, being there, being present and being of the journey!
June 6th, 2010 at 8:51 am
Here it is!
I Am From
I am from the roots of Celtic trees, with a hint of Abenaki,
ice blue eyes and knarly branches softened by the arrival of baby after baby.
Inheritance of my father’s attitude keeps me real, and always searching:
back roads and new places beckon.
I am from parents who taught me to drive, championed me as I cheered,
made long-distance friendships possible and rushed to be there when babies were born.
Family who gathers still at Christmas though our matriarch is, sadly, gone.
It is not the same, but we hold on to what was for so long.
My father says he does not visit ghosts.
I wonder who he thinks he is kidding.
I am from musty cottages, knotty pine, sun burns that throbbed to the touch,
and long walks up a hill that has grown smaller with time.
The scent of Pier fries swirls between kiddie rides as my mother looks on,
and tomorrow morning will be perfect for sloshing in slickers at the shore.
Sand dollars, painted rocks and sculptures of found treasures are tucked forever
into the corners of my memory, undiminished.
I am from a time when it was safe for us to walk to school,
until it wasn’t safe anymore,
life’s lesson that has been driven home time and again.
I am from the ultimate betrayal and a battle back from the edge of hell,
holding my child’s hand and heart as we navigated together,
victorious at the finish, though the truth still stings.
I am from the heartbeat of my children,
tethered by a silken thread, my gift in this crazy world.
Pulsing with all the things I’ve taught and learned,
things I wish I could give them, wish I could spare them,
like parents before me, all I can really do is hope for the best,
and to the powers that be, give thanks.
I am from lost and found,
mistakes and redemption,
broken hearts and mended dreams, and finally,
a fairy tale.
I am from the whisper of waves calling to me,
come, come…
then shushing me, telling me I am okay,
and so fortunate.
June 6th, 2010 at 10:12 am
You are an amazing writer my friend! xoxoxo
June 6th, 2010 at 10:21 am
Chris, Shannon, AMAZING. Just wanted to tell you both that you are truly gifts to this world, and i am lucky to know you both..
June 6th, 2010 at 1:35 pm
My Guardian Angel….saw me through several difficult moments….times of my life. Was and is my journey any harder than yours? Easier? We are all on this field trip together and thats why I see my guardian angel through a kaleidopscope.
The angel is not just my Mom who told me not to touch a stove-top as a child. Nor is it just my Dad who taught me how to safely use an axe to split wood for the campfire. My siblings, all older than me, gave me great insight, without their even knowing it, into right and wrong. I know its wrong to toss a pack of firecrackers into a roaring fireplace, but I knew it was right when I was comforted with a hug during a lightning storm.
When I look through the lense of the kaleidoscope I also see my generations before me, guding me spiritually. When I am fishing the upper part of the Connecticut River I am wary of the unseen power of the water. Knowing that loggers of years past lost their lives I respect Mother Nature and wade carefully, not wanting to join the spirits of the river.
Family, friends, souls of the past, soulmates of the present….Mother Nature and Father Time. They all come together through my lense to protect me….and to guide me.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, we all are participating in this passage. With a fail-safe thought in mind, I’d like to share this: We all drink the same water, breathe the same air. We all share in the triumphs and weep in moments of sorrow. In simple terms, we all need the same basics to survive. Lets share a moment to say hi to a stranger. Ask if someone we see struggling needs a hand…or a hug! We can share our strength with peace and connect with the Earth we walk on with the healing powers of the stones that grace the bracelets we wear. We are each others guardian angel!
June 6th, 2010 at 5:45 pm
Welcome John! Thank you so much for joining the contest and for sharing your thoughts! I couldn’t agree more with your words!!!
xoxoxo Chris
June 6th, 2010 at 7:20 pm
Hi all! Your stories are inspirational. I have not seen and do not know who my guardian angel is for sure but am positive there is one.
When my son was 14 he was a pedestrian hit by a drunk driver going 62 mph in a 25mph zone. His injuries were so severe he was flown to Children’s Hospital in Philadelphia and not taken to a local hospital. It was the longest 6 minutes of my life as we choppered our way over the street lit city and I prayed my son would make the journey. My other worry was that I would get motion sick…miraculously I did not. After several hours in the emergency room where he screamed that he would rather die than be is this much pain and Dr’s confirmed his right leg had blood flow and would not have to be amputated he spent the night in surgery.
The next morning his surgeon told us of the external fixator, rods and screws implanted in his body, that there was a good chance he would not be able to move the 4 small toes on his right foot, and he would need a skin graft and future surgeries. OK, so be it, considering what could have been.
To make a long story short…he finished his inpatient and outpatient therapies 15 months later. He just turned 17 and has come a long way. If you don’t see his many scars or know that he can’t run like a normal kid you would never know what he had been through. When people asked me about him I would say…Yes, he is a lucky boy….but that changed to include… and I am a lucky mom.
Every time I think of what could have been I know for sure we have a guardian angel watching over us and I am thankful more than my words can express.
June 6th, 2010 at 8:02 pm
Hello all….thank you everyone for participating in this contest! It ends tomorrow, as you know and I am truly grateful that everyone has shared, vented and dreamed…on this website. It has meant a great deal!
I would like to share a story of a guardian angel that touched my life, and my family’s life. A boy, I never met…changed the course of destiny and for that I could not be more aware of the forces that define us, seen and unseen.
In March, a young boy, dared to break up a fight during a birthday party, and for that sacrificed his life. He could not have known in that second, that another man, a gang member, was ready to take it, and would.
Conor Reynolds would die that night, March 13, 2010. He would be brutally, senselessly stabbed in the neck and die in a parking lot. His friends would carry him out and stand guard as he left this plane, to go on to the next. His family would gather in the emergency room, stunned, shocked and speechless, to say goodbye to their son, their friend and their now angel…before his prom, his graduation, and before his 18th birthday.
I never met Conor, but I did meet his family and some friends. To meet such a soul, and be moved without knowing ever knowing him is a major life changing event. I dreamed of Conor a few times and thought I saw him once. I worked diligently with his family to set up The Honor Conor Inc Foundation…a non profit to help end the violence of kids killing kids.
I wrote endless essays, and even organized a candlelight vigil…worldwide on what would have been Conor’s 18th birthday, May 8th. I write to share what having a guardian angel has meant to me, recently. I also write that you all, all who read this, will each year, every year, light a candle for peace, for an end to violence and for your guardian angel.
May 8th, each year, every year.
Hardships? Yes, I have my share, or maybe more, maybe less…depending on the yardstick we measure challenges by…but with every one I have learned to go on, move on, and keep moving.
I wish you all luck on your journey’s, peace through your travels, and a way to focus on the angels in the hardships that we all face….
Peace, always…Chris
June 7th, 2010 at 11:11 am
Well to be honest, I feel like I am one of the luckiest people alive. I come from a wonderful family full of opportunity. I grew up going to private schools and college. I have traveled all over the Earth. To South America, Australia, New Zealand, Asia and Alaska. Almost all 50 states, and to Europe, and have a trip coming up to Hawaii. I went to sleep away camps as a young child and had any material object that was around. I still live a life of luxury but there is one thing that i have always wanted to do and that is to do something that actually means something to the universe.
I am now in my 30’s and i have never had to work for anything. Maybe my angels have been very generous to me over the years. I am an honest woman, and maybe it is the great karma that keeps me so high. I would never ever trade what i have been given, but if i was able to get this bracelet, the angels could help me give back to the universe 10 fold. i love the world so much and have so much good energy to give to it. i just once again need their help and guidance. I am so full and i would love to share all my good fortune to whomever i can.i need my angels to lift me to the highest form so i can help in way shape or form. i think this is my calling. Maybe by me getting the bracelet means that they believe that I can do it.
thanks for letting me share!!!
June 7th, 2010 at 11:19 am
What would I do if I could not fail? Well, I’ve learned that I cannot fail; I am a success as I was created and that is what I am on this earth to remember, just as everyone else is.
I am 27 years old, originally from San Diego, California, and I have lived in Dubai in the United Arab Emirates for two years. Here I have learned so many lessons, about personal strength, grace and trust in the wisdom that the obstacles that unfold before me every moment are blessings that have taught me to always remember my divinity and to learn that I don’t have to obtain qualities to be a child of God, but that I have to REMEMBER those qualities in order to REMEMBER that I am a child of God.
For the past two years I have been a preschool teacher in the Middle East. I work with beautiful, wonderful and wise children from all over the world. One little boy in my class, Adam, has been in my class for two years, as he has a severe speech delay and needed to repeat the year. Adam is unlike any person, let alone child, I have ever known. His eyes resonate with a deep wisdom, as though he knows secrets of the world we are all searching for, and his eyes dance with the laughter of a guru who knows that the person he is looking at is right where he should be. He is only three years old, but his eyes tell me he has seen this world many times over.
When I first met Adam two years ago, I found working with him deeply frustrating. He didn’t communicate with me like other children, and I never understood why he didn’t do what I asked him to do, why he didn’t enjoy painting, or why he cried for (what appeared to me) no reason, all the time. I loved him as I loved every child, but I found him deeply, deeply frustrating.
One day I was asking the children in my class to tidy up, and Adam, as usual, was not contributing. I was so frustrated with him. I raised my voice with him repeatedly and asked him to tidy up the toys. He gave me a defiant look and didn’t budge. Knowing how clever he was, I knew he knew he was controlling the situation and just being stubborn. So, I put him in time out…..and his beautiful, star- filled eyes poured tears. My heart broke and filled with guilt. A few nights later I had a dream about Adam, he was talking to me, as a man, only in his adorable little boy body. He told me, “I am talking to you Carey, why aren’t you listening?”
The next morning I woke up and went to work. When Adam came to class I was overwhelmed with the memory of my dream. I looked at him and my heart filled with bursting love and I smiled, and he smiled so big and his eyes again danced with that look, once again, of ” I knew you’d figure it out.” That day when it was time to tidy up I asked Adam to tidy up, like normal, and he once again did nothing. Only this time, for me, something shifted. I bent down to Adam and said softly and sweetly to please put the toys away, and told him that I knew he could understand me.
He gave one of his amazing smiles, turned around, and picked up all the toys, without having to be asked again. Adam can’t talk, but Adam communicates in the deepest form a human can. He communicates with love. Adam responds to love. Adam has taught me that the only way we can really learn is through love.
We cannot teach with anger or fear, it is not a natural part of our composition. If we do not teach love, we do not teach truth. People look at Adam and pity him because of his speech delay, and treat him as though he has failed a part of life somehow. I look at Adam now with all the admiration of the world. I walked into a classroom expecting to teach the children, and left the most learned student of all. Being in Adam’s presence has taught me that I don’t need a bracelet to ensure that I have a guardian angel with me. He has taught me that I am surrounded by angels all the time, I only need to remember. I know everything I need to know, I just need to remember.
BIG LOVE,
Carey
June 7th, 2010 at 11:19 am
Unlike many of these essays, mine is one of finding my way, not hardships and sadness. I am so very sorry about all of you who posted such sad stories and truly wish all of you the best for your future lives.
My story begins with my dissatisfaction of not having a purpose in life other than the choices I made of getting married, having children, etc. I simply was not cut out to be a stay at home mother and having a boring job, that was simply that, a job.
What to do? Researching various careers, I decided, at 35, to go to a 2 year art school for Visual Merchandising. While at school, which was no easy task, also having a part time job and two young boys at home, I discovered I had an actual talent for design, color and composition. Who knew??
I worked hard in school, met people through Art Department internships, and graduated with honors and a 4.0 GPA. During my last months in school, I had the good fortune to intern on a major film shooting in my city and gained valuable knowledge and resources. Again, I worked for free, but what I learned during this time was worth gold. After this movie, I was lucky enough to work on one after another and have been doing this for the last 16 years.
I found my calling at last and have appreciated every minute of it. I strongly believe that when I found my purpose, my Guardian Angel stepped up and guided me through the years to achieve my personal best. Had I not naturally discovered what I was best suited for me, my angel could not have come forward.
Obviously, making movies is not equal to saving lives or other more worldly pursuits, but it has created in me a satisfaction and happiness that fulfills me and my family and in turn, that radiates throughout our worlds and makes us better people.
I am now considering a new career path, but not quite sure if it’s the right one. I would love to win the Guardian Angel bracelet to wear to see if it brings with it the answers I might use to live the next phase of my life in peace and happiness. That’s not too much to ask, is it??
Peace and love to everyone.
Sharon
June 7th, 2010 at 11:45 am
I am not even sure where to start, when I read everyone’s stories, I feel as if mine isn’t nearly as inspirational. But never the less I will share.
Who is my guardian angel? I truly believe I have two. From an outsiders point of view I was born into a normal enough family. But in reality it was a terrible situation. My father beat my mom and my siblings (I am the youngest of four) on a regular basis. And when I was three, my mom, packed us up and scraped up enough money to get us on a bus. Where were we headed? The other side of the country. My mom managed to make a good enough living to keep s roof over our heads. When I was six, we were taken away from my mom and forced into foster care (where we were split up my brother and my older sister were together and my other sister and me were together), because my mom (allegedly) tried to kill us. We stayed in foster care until I was almost eight years old. My mom was given custody of us again, however, a stipulation was placed on: we had to live in the same city as a relative. So again we moved. When I was 11, I entered the 7th grade and met one of the greatest people I have ever meet: Joan. I met her outside the orchestra room (yup, I was a orchestra geek) and she was funny. So we started hanging out. But I soon realized that she had the worse memory of anyone, because I would mention something and she would have no idea what I was talking about. It took a while, but I found out she had a twin and unknown to me, I had been talking to her a sister. As time went by I developed a really close friendship with them. But the bond I had with Joan was unbelievable. When tryouts for basketball came around, I wanted to try out but I didn’t want to try out by myself, so Joan (who couldn’t shoot a bebe into the ocean) tried out with me. And from there forward, where I was she was. Junior High got harder for me. My mom is a clinically diagnosed schizophrenic and couldn’t hold down a job, so money was always tight. She also would get in these suicidal moods which would make living with her hard. The only time I found solace was the 8 hours I was at school. No one ever knew about my mom, no one except for Joan. There would be nights when I would walk the mile to her house and just cry. And she let me. As time went by i started leaning on Joan more and more because she was my rock… But the spring of our freshmen year, Joan didn’t come back from Christmas break. I figured she was just sick or whatever and would be back. But days turned into weeks, weeks into months. And finally her parents told me that Joan had a brain tumor that was inoperable. Joan died two weeks before her 16th birthday. I was crushed. High school was harder than junior high, my mom’s illness was getting worse and not better. And on August 10th, 1997 (less than two weeks before I was to start my senior year), my mom tried to kill me. She pulled a knife on me and actually stabbed me. The result? My mom was sent to a mental hospital (where she would remain for most of my senior year) and I would become an angry person. life as I knew it changed quickly. my grades dropped, I got kicked off the varsity basketball team (my one love), and I stopped playing my violin. College scholarship offers dried up quickly, no one wants a player with baggage. I was down to three schools. All private, all small. Not my first or even second choices, but schools that I had applied to that Joan had talked about going to.
Although I ended up choosing Joan’s second option and five years later I graduated with honors and a two sport all conference student-athlete; it was a struggle every step of the way. But I have learned through struggle comes success.
I went to graduate school to become a coach, I left with a mission to change the lives of those who couldn’t. I decided to become an academic advisor for student-athletes. Three years into my career, I got my dream job (literally) as a learning specialist for a BCS school. While there I was faced with challenges on a regular basis. From coaches pushing students towards “perceived easy majors” to pulling scholarship money and kicking kids out mid year. While there I met this kid named Damien. Damien was from inner city LA (a place I have never been nor ever want to be). A kid who had the ability to be great, but had always been passed on because he could catch a ball. We battled, he wanted me to do his work or give him tutors. I challenged him to do the work. He complained that I wanted him to get As, I countered with if a C is the best you can do i am okay with that. After a year of being there, i knew deep down that BCS schools weren’t for me (you need to be pretty darn close to soulless to work there) so i left. I kept in touch with Damien, so when he told me he was leaving I was happy for him. Unfortunately, his transfer didn’t go so smoothly and he was forced to go home to JUCO. I promised him that if he could get his AA, I would find him a school. He worked his butt off and was in his last semester of JUCO, when I called him to tell him that I found him a school and to be ready to headed out to the midwest in the summer, I never thought that would be my last time talking to him. Two days latter I got the calling, telling me that he had been gunned down and was dead. April 5th, 2009 will always be a day that stays with me. I thought I was changing his life, and maybe I was, but his death has changed mine.
It seems that whenever I am having a bad day and i log onto my facebook, there will be a thing saying hey you haven’t talked to Damien in a while. Or I’ll find one of the stupid little posted that he had left on my door on a daily basis. But most of all, he continues to make sure that the kids I work with, hear what I am telling them. I do think that a lot of the kids who chose to come to the school I am, came because Damien, let them know I am there for them.
Joan & Damien, two lives gone too soon. But two lives who have guided me through thick and thin…
June 7th, 2010 at 12:53 pm
I wanted to post a comment that my Dad made on Saturday. He called me on my cell phone, which he rarely does, to say that he really enjoyed this essay and it brought a tear to his eye. He always reads my essays but rarely comments and doesn’t comment on my site, via the text box….so I wanted to add him in…even though he doesn’t know hos to use FB, lol!
June 7th, 2010 at 1:09 pm
Everyone has had personal mishaps in life. I do not believe anyone has had the “perfect” life. We learn on the rocky road of life…. what does not kill us truly make us stronger.
I truly did not have the ideal childhood. I was abused as a child by my own parents and counted the months, years that I would leave the house. I met a man whom I thought would get me out of this situation, and left.
Little did I realize I went from the fire and into the frying pan. I was now verbally abused in more ways anyone could imagine. It is amazing how I found the strength to carry on. There was no way I would consider ending my own life. I was here for a reason, and when I was young my guardian angel came to me in my dream. I believe he was there supporting me.
As I write this, I feel a hug …
I became homeless for a while, feeling as though no one loved me. Then one day a door opened up where I was able to find a job, clean up and find a modest place to live. Somehow, this experience (so far) made me a very strong person.
A while later, my only younger brother committed suicide. I was the only one in the family who had found the strength to think clearly and take charge of the situation. This was very hard since he was my best little friend. He is around sometimes.
My father (about two weeks later) got in a car accident in his new car. He said as he was spinning out of control, someone pushed him into the seat. It was not the seatbelt. Witnesses said there were two people in the car. Infact the policeman kept on asking him where was the other person.
I believe my brother is an Angel watching over everyone.
Again, this experience added to my life experience to make me a stronger person.
Being abused, I was very angry at everyone….but one day, I found the strength to forgive. It was as if a door opened up for me. Holding grudges or angry sentiments does not help a person to grow and move on. Well, I’ll be honest I have had days where I do get into that deep dark corner but with the deep love I have for my parents whom I truly do forgive (but perhaps a touch angry :p ) I carry on.
My experiences in life have helped me help others carry on. I met people who have had been in same situations I have been in and are still holding on to enourmous amount of anger. I have helped some to let it go. I have helped people in some relationship issues as well as things with suicide and depression. I don’t really approach these people but they seem to find me!!!
What I could do if I could not fail is to finally resolve that tiny bit of anger and not go into that dark corner. I don’t mind continuing to help either but at least keep me grounded when I feel a surge of anger coming. It never resolves anything.
Funny, as I write this I can’t remember when I was in that angry corner. Perhaps I did resolve it???
The bracelet is pretty and nice…and of course my selfish side (I think we all have it to a degree) would want it to help keep me grounded, but if I come across someone that really needs help I would not hesitate to pass it on to help them and remind them that keeping anger inside does not resolve anything, but letting it all go and forgiving does….especially truly, honestly forgiving.
Peace!
June 7th, 2010 at 3:10 pm
When I was young my Nana told me that when a door opens that you have closed, it means your guardian angel is coming through the door behind you.
There have been times in my life when I believed that and other times when I believed it was just because I did not shut the door tight enough. I still flip back in forth between belief (most of the time) and non-belief. The times of non-belief come when my logical mind looks at the non-physical evidence and dismisses the invisible to the dark reaches of my mind as false and stupid.
Then somehow, some when, I learned about energy and vibrations from a spiritual perspective. The idea that everything was energy and that this energy vibrated at different levels and affected your physical being in different ways explained, in my mind, Angels, Goddesses, Animal Spirits, Charkas, nonverbal communication and so much more. It made sense to my logical mind and I was able to begin to marry the two halfs of myself into one being, heart and mind, body and soul, all operating for the higher good of myself and those around me. It completely changed how I looked at the world.
What would I do if I could not fail? Change the world, of course. And I do that every time I shift a perspective, bring a smile to another face, support someone in achieving their dreams. I would bring peace, inner peace to everyone in the world so that they knew, truly knew, that we are all one family, one being. That the only job here on earth is to love and be loved. With a heart full of love it is hard to rain down death and destruction on each other and this earth.
In love and light
Celina
June 7th, 2010 at 3:18 pm
Celina….sounds like you had a wise and wonderful Nana! =)
June 7th, 2010 at 7:12 pm
Hi there,
We are more than proud and happy to annouce you as the WINNER of the Energy Muse Guardian Angel coin bracelet! Your entry was among some of the best we have read and it moved us, inspired us and compelled us to not only reach for the unseen, but to remember the unseen as well. Although every entry moved us in some way, yours ranked the highest! Your words, message and inspiration are amazing! Congratulations Carey!!!!!
Peace, Chris
June 16th, 2010 at 8:54 pm
Howdy, your site is on air in the radio! Good job mate. Your posts are truly great and bookmarked. Regards